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when i walk with heads down
doesn't mean i'm emo

when i frown a lot
doesn't mean i'm depressed

just because i like gore
doesn't mean i'm gothic

i am who i feel i want to be

click on the "Not Emo!" to suit your mood.

Name : F.i.L.h.A.d.
Gender : Male
Height : 174.5 cm
Weight : 58 KG
School : Guangyang Pri
Anderson Sec
Class : 1605 2606 3307 4308
CCAs : Angklung ODAC Art Club


his wishlist

# pass both Maths
# LIR5 to be less than 14
# O Level Results
# grow taller to 180cm
# get a fake tan
# whiten my teeth and align my jaw
# parfum/eau de parfum/eau de toilette
# a tight fitting white jeans (not skinnies)
# new shoes
# master the art of Blue Steel
# smile way more

It was 11:21 PM on a red Saturday, May 28, 2005...

Ola.. Kay i juz wanna apologise... I make my mistakes lyk u all do... I am a human being lyk u all are... I'm sorrie kay if i hurt anybody... Pls, forgive me... i juz dun wan 2 hurt anyone... Anywae, y did u all read my blog in d 1st place?? haiz... Lemme guess, u r her frens rite? Anywaez, i am sorry... Aku mintak maaf... Gomenasai... Oh, n ulfah, i wanna apologise too... I'm sorrie for getting u into trouble for nt deleting those msges after i use kim's fone... I'm soo sorie... And makcik, kenapa lah ko tu kpo sngt seh?? Aku nye hidup aku nye suke ah... Ola, dis is supposed to b a letter of forgiveness... So, i wan to apologise to anyone or evryone hu i haf hurt... Sorie... Thank u 4 ur kind understanding... ahahax... Chiao!


Yes, you heard it first here.



It was 5:25 PM on a red Thursday, May 19, 2005...

Hi, Ulfah! My mum dun care lah if i over sms... She lets me sms n dun care so long as i dun exceed d 700 free sms... Bt if u wanna stop msging me its orite... I understand... Bt one ting, yg kawan aku nye mum tu was exaggerating... She is a troublemaker... Aku mmang tk suke dier one bit pun... Anak de pun bukannye baik nah... Aper seh, anak sendiri tk tau nk jaga nk gossip psl anak org lak... um, let me cont wif d letter... i am soo NOT scared of my mum k... I dun care if she wanna scold me or wad ah... My mum is nt d reason y i dun tok 2 ppl especially gals, its my lack of confidence... U really dunno hw i usually feel during recess... I haf dis feeling in my stomache which i wanna throw up bt it juz wldn't come out... Dis feelings comes wen i watch others having fun, chatting wif deir frens, playing wif each other but i am all alone... I will feel so different n inferior... I wanna end dis pain bt i dunno hw to... I am almost giving up... Do u noe dat every tym during klas i feel lyk i juz wanna shout out n tok loudly lyk naf n co. bt deep inside i noe dat i cant... U noe i am lyk a bird in a cage... I am locked in a cage n wanna fly out... Bt even wen i managed to escape, i would die... Because i dunnoe hw to live anymore... I would not b able to survive the wild... Ppl do wanna tok to me bt i juz cldnt... my mouth will be glued n i wouldnt b able to tok... In my heart d phrase "I am lame so don't tok coz ppl hate lamers" will keep appearing... I am juz soo vulnerable... Breathe into me n make me real... Ulfah, u r rite... I am not a real person... Mayb i am juz an illusion created by myself... Mayb i dun even exist... Bye! *vanishes into thin air*


Yes, you heard it first here.



It was 9:04 PM on a red Sunday, May 15, 2005...

YaY!!! Finally d old address is gone!!! Thank allah... nw my sis can't peep into my private life... ok, i noe dat nw blogs r checked 4 vulgarities or adult nature so no more of dose k? nw it's clean... or rather it's been blocked... n i am gonna try my very best 2 clean myself coz afterall d end is near n i dun wanna suffer coz of d setans... anywae, 2 dae... nuting much... xcept i dunno y alot of ppl r onlyn 2dae... N yesterdae i chat wif suffian n d dae b4 wif izyan... sec 2s whom i've neva eva spoken to... let me b a reporter 4 awhile k?? It has been reported that certain parts of Singapore felt a tremor following reports of an earthquake in Sumarta. The following area are Toa Payoh, BISHAN, ANG MO KIO and 3 others. The residents of Sumartra have been moved to a safer place. For now i advise all d citizens of Singapore to clean their soul as it looks like the end of the world is coming soon. Strange happenings had happened. Examples are the cities of Dubai are snowing and Mina are flooding. It has been said that the earth will end soon once the sun rises from the west n sets in the east. So i urge all the ppl to be believe more in their religion and god. That's all i have for today. Filhad reporting life from Bishan out.


Yes, you heard it first here.